Batman - The Movie (1966)

“Pass me down…the Shark Repellent Batspray” – Batman

This is, in a way, a follow-up to my recent personal blog wherein I looked fondly back at my first encounter with Batman, and how that character became a lifelong hero. You can read that here.

It still seems incredible to me that I’ve been an obsessive fan of Batman in particular and comic book superheroes in general for sixty years now. I don’t even want to think how much time and money I’ve spent on this over the years, but they’ve made my life way more colourful and fun that I think it would’ve been otherwise.

So, in chronological terms, the Batman TV series debuted in the USA in early 1966. In-between the first and second season, the cast and crew would get no hiatus. As soon as filming the first season wrapped, they went straight on to film this movie and then on to the second season. This film was released in the summer of 1966, at the height of the Bat mania craze. To us in the UK, this movie was our pilot. Our introduction to Adam West as Batman. The series would be shown here the following year, as I recall.

As I recounted in my blog, I was six. From the second I saw the character on a series of bubble gum cards, I was hooked. (For life, as it happens. Well, it could be worse. At least it wasn’t drugs or alcohol, right?). So, when this film arrived at the Palladium cinema in my home town for a run of probably a week, it was a big thing for me, and another pivotal moment in my development. I recall it was a sunny Wednesday afternoon. The Palladium ran Wednesday afternoon matinees during the summer holiday months. A long-suffering sister accompanied me, probably begrudgingly. In those days, a cinema outing was a rare treat.

Some things to remember. As a small child staring at the screen, I questioned nothing I saw. I had no idea that the onscreen Batman I was watching was, in fact, a two-tiered presentation that played as an over-the-top comedy to adults, and to us kids it was high adventure, to be taken as seriously as Adam West and Burt Ward portrayed their characters.

The mood is set from the title sequence, showing Batman (West) and Robin (Ward) stalking an alleyway caught only in a coloured spotlight. Also shown are the Rogues Gallery of Villains; Joker (Cesar Romero), Penguin (Burgess Meredith), Riddler (Frank Gorshin) and Catwoman (Lee Meriwether).

As the film opens, in their civilian identities of millionaire Bruce Wayne and his ward Dick Grayson, our heroes speed back to stately Wayne Manor having received a tip that a heinous crime is about to take place. Commodore Schmidlapp (Reginald Denney) the owner of the Big Ben Distillery is in grave danger aboard Gotham bound yacht, along with a valuable invention. Stopping only to wave at Alfred, the Butler (Alan Napier) and doting Aunt Harriet (Madge Blake) in her only appearance in the film, the duo rush to the study, descend to the subterranean nerve centre, the Batcave and speed out in the fabulous Batmobile, en-route to the airport where the Batcopter is being prepared for immediate take-off. (Phew, this film’s already exhausting and we’re only a few minutes in. Stand by though, things are even more chaotically hectic from now on.)

Okay, let’s pause for a second. It goes against the grain here but let’s just ask some questions – Bruce and Dick were driving along and they got a tip? How? Nobody knows they’re Batman & Robin other than Alfred. Did they verify the information before heading out? How did they know exactly where the yacht would be? But y’know what? It doesn’t matter. This isn’t a film to be picked at, so I won’t pick at threads like why didn’t Batman recognise Catwoman instantly when she was undercover and unmasked. The whole movie would unravel and the fun would stop. So, in the spirit of that wide eyed six-year-old sitting unblinking in the stalls at the Palladium on that Wednesday afternoon, let’s just get swept along, okay?

As they approach the yacht, the Bat ladder (No, I’m not kidding, it has a label) is deployed and Batman descends – except, the whole yacht vanishes!!!! Batman is hip deep in the ocean and there’s a shark with its jaws firmly clamped on his thigh. As Robin says; “holy sardine”. Luckily though, the Batcopter is equipped with a range of repellent batsprays, including barracuda, manta ray and shark – because you never know, right? As soon as the shark gets a whiff of the spray, it releases its grasp without even leaving a rip on Batman’s tights and explodes.

Back at Gotham Police HQ, accompanied by Commissioner Gordon (Neil Hamilton) and his hapless Chief of Police Chief O’Hara (Stafford Repp) Batman concludes a press conference covering his recent escapade. In the press corps is a Russian reporter, Comrade Kitanya lrenya Tatanya Karenska Alisoff from "The Moscow Bugle". Luckily, she shortens it to Kitka. BUT… it’s revealed after the press conference that she’s a (very barely) disguised Catwoman.

Lee Meriwether took the role of the feline felon for this film as series regular Julie Newmar was unavailable, having signed on to appear in a Western. Meriwether however does a creditable fill-in, but let’s face it, Newmar is STILL the absolutely definitive Catwoman. Nobody to date has done it better.

Back at Police HQ, Batman, Robin, Gordon and O’Hara have deduced that the exploding shark was pulling Batman’s leg – obviously with work of the Joker, also as all the clues add up to a sinister riddle – the Riddler must also be involved. Their files show that additionally, Penguin and Catwoman are also currently on the loose. The only objective those four could possibly have…is world domination.

The United Underworld have their HQ above the Old Benbow Tavern, a dive on Gotham pier. They’ve already kidnapped Schmidlapp, who’s convinced he’s still on his yacht, and they have his invention a Super Molecular Dehydrator. Meanwhile, our heroes are back in the Batcave, where they discover that the yacht illusion can only have been projected from an illegal buoy. To the Batboat!!!

Nothing is ever easy when you’re a virtuous crimefighter. They’re spotted on the buoy with its super powered lenses by the villains who have a submarine, painted in Penguin livery. One flick of a switch and the helpless heroes are stuck to the buoy by the Penguin’s magnet, caught by the metallic equipment in their utility belts, while the villain shoots torpedoes at them. The torpedoes are detonated in turn by a wave of negative energy from Batman’s radio (just don’t ask) except for the last one, the batteries on Batman’s radio are dead. There’s an explosion and the villains celebrate their victory.

Cut to the Batboat swiftly approaching the shore. A porpoise nobly jumped into the path of the torpedo at the last moment, saving their lives – though it’s a mystery how they got away from the buoy’s magnet. As they reach shore, a POLARIS missile is launched, two riddles are written in the sky cluing them that Miss Kitka is in danger. To keep her safe, they decide that undercover, in his identity of Bruce Wayne, Batman will date her – unaware that it’s a kidnap plan to grab Wayne to lure Batman into a deadly trap. (Adam West had agreed to this film on condition that he got to do more scenes as Bruce Wayne, i.e. without the mask.) They make their escape on Penguin’s giant flying umbrellas while Robin and a mask wearing Alfred watch helplessly from the Batmobile.

Wayne escapes his captors and makes his way back to the Manor and returns to the United Underworld HQ with Robin, only to find a bomb waiting for them.

Okay, this is my favourite part of the movie. Sending Robin to safety, Batman needs to dispose of the bomb with the fuse running perilously close to detonation. Running desperately with the bomb held above his head, Batman’s routes are all thwarted by Nuns, a young mother pushing a pram, a couple in a rowing boat, some ducks and a Salvation Army band. As he says; “Some days, you just can’t get rid of a bomb!”

The bomb explodes, but luckily Batman sheltered just in time behind some steel scaffolding. No rest though, they’re approached by The Penguin, purporting to be Commodore Schmidlapp – but they see through his disguise. Playing along, they use their Batsleep spray to render him unconscious while they take him to the Batcave to administer a retinal eye scan to establish his identity. BUT – the wily bird has a plan. He has used the dehydrator to dehydrate several of his henchmen, who he rehydrates in the cave – but he mistakenly uses the dangerous heavy water faucet which makes them unstable, so the criminals disappear as soon as they’re hit in the ensuing fight. Batman decides to give the Penguin some rope, and pretends to believe he is actually Schmidlapp. But on their way back to the city, Penguin gasses them and takes the Batmobile.

Never fear, the deadly gas had no effect, thanks to an antidote batpill taken in advance and luckily, the Batcycle is hidden behind a bush nearby (this is the third and last of the new vehicles audiences saw in the film) – so it’s off to the airport and the Batcopter. BUT – the Riddler sends up another of his sky-writing POLARIS missiles, and it hits the Batcopter, sending it spinning helplessly to Earth and certain doom this time for the Dynamic Duo.

Except the Caped Crusader spotted some rubber foam mattresses outside a convention hall and aims the crippled chopper to land safely there.

Now, it’s a quick run across town to the United World building, to save the members of the Security Council – but the villains are there first, and dehydrate the Council making their escape via the Penguin’s submarine and out to the open sea, closely followed by the Duo in the Batboat who drive the sub to the surface with a sonic charge, leading to the climactic fight.

But it’s not over for Batman – chasing Catwoman down to the control room, she unmasks and he realises he’s looking in to the face of Kitka, his one true love – since the previous night. (The events of the whole film seem to happen within a 48-hour span. It’s a hectic life.) Not only that, but the test tubes containing the powdered members of the security council have spilt and the real Schmidlapp has appeared out of his cabin, still unaware he’s been abducted, and sneezes – mixing up the various members.

Never before has the world been in a more dire predicament. Luckily, the Batcave is equipped with a Molecular Separator. And Batman, watched by the world, is able to separate the powders which make up the individual Council members. But as they rehydrate back at the United World building, we see there are subtle differences. They all speak different languages. This might be a good thing. Who knows?

Batman and Robin leave quietly.

In writing this up, despite having seen this film SO many times over the years, I’m amazed at how much action is squeezed in to every second of its running time. Yes, seen now with my sixty-six-year-old eyes, the film is a big, very silly romp, full of wild improbabilities and plot holes bigger than the Batcave. But looking through six-year-old eyes, and fondly recalling how excited I was watching this, my first version of Batman, I’m not ashamed to admit how much I loved it back then and, in that spirit, still do.

Twenty-three years would pass before the Gotham Guardian would grace the screen again, in a very different interpretation for a very different world. The times, they had changed.